Human beings need to feel that they belong to a group (friends, school, work, family). Feeling identified with that group, developing that environment in which we can flow and find our comfort zone to develop in the best way.
How hard it is when we feel alone even when surrounded by people. That is why the opposite of loneliness is not company but BELONGING.
Human beings need to feel that they belong to a group (friends, school, work, family). Feel identified with that group.
But why is the sense of belonging important?
In Positive Discipline, this word BELONGING is spoken all the time because, thanks to it, human beings can feel motivated, happy, interested in things, healthy. The opposite of belonging would be to be EXCLUDED and this would imply a lack of motivation, a lack of interest and a mental and intellectual state with low performance.
It happens to all human beings that when we feel that we do not belong, loneliness is born in us, even if we have millions of people just a few meters away. The same thing happens to boys and girls. From the moment they are born they need to BELONG, to feel that they are part of the family, affection, love, protection in the face of their fragility, these are the things that a family provides when their baby arrives.
What would happen if the baby that was one day is now a boy and is expecting a little brother? What would happen if the family, even from their love, did not know how to show them that belonging?
The child would possibly acquire the functions of the baby, he would resubmit his language (already learned) to a more primitive one like that of his brother, baby, he would babble. Possibly he would stop relieving himself in the bathroom to do as his baby brother does. But why?
Because you need to belong. Because since his baby brother came home, the whole family hasn't stopped adore him and he's the star of the home. The child in an act of "survival" realizes that he becomes visible and notorious to the family when he talks like his brother, when he poops like his brother. That is why he finds a new way to BELONG but without any other kind of purpose.
You just need to feel like you belong in your family group again. This is one example of belonging in the child, but there are many more. And the solutions to these cases should always be to involve the child in the things that happen in his family so that he feels that he belongs, so that he does not feel that loneliness even when surrounded by people.
Positive Discipline is a great tool for adults, for parents, to understand the child, to put ourselves in their shoes.
Positive discipline is in tune with the Montessori philosophy, since both speak of respect for the child and the preparation of the adult. Positive Discipline and the Montessori philosophy, together are very powerful and it is necessary to learn from them, investigate and implement them if we bet on a respectful upbringing, in the case of Montessori pedagogy they are not only materials, Montessori goes much further, it is the complete understanding of the human being from birth, is the natural way in which we should understand and respect children. It is BEING and BEING from the HEART and REASON.
That is why it is a philosophy of life.